The Courage To Be Disliked And Still Do Your Thing

So there’s this line in The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga:

“Freedom is being disliked by other people.”

That line just… stayed with me.

Not in a deep, philosophical way. More like, it poked at something I already knew but didn’t want to admit out loud.

When I read it, I immediately thought about when I started Pixel Parlour.

At the time, I had this strong urge to build a space for designers that wasn’t just about chasing clout or hopping on trends. I wanted honest conversations. Quiet growth. A community that felt real.

But not everyone got it.

Some folks thought it was unnecessary. Others assumed it was just another Slack group with a fancy name.

A few even asked if I was trying too hard to be different.

And it bugged me, honestly.

I kept second-guessing everything.

Should I tone it down? Should I make it look more like the other design communities so it’s easier to explain?

But this book reminded me. That’s the price of freedom.

If you need everyone to nod along, you’re not really free. You’re performing.

It also made me think about my early freelance gigs.

I remember one client. A local tech founder. He ghosted me after I told him his onboarding flow needed to be rebuilt from scratch.

He thought I was being difficult.

I was just being honest.

And at the time, I took it so personally. Like I’d done something wrong by speaking up.

Now I look back and think maybe that was my first small act of freedom.

It also shows up when I mentor younger designers on ADPList.

Sometimes they’ll say, “But what if the client doesn’t like my idea?”

And I’ll say, “That’s okay. Your job isn’t to be liked. It’s to be helpful.”

Which, yeah, sounds wise and all.

But even I still struggle with it.

Especially here in Sri Lanka where the design scene is small and word spreads fast.

If someone thinks you're arrogant, it sticks.

If someone thinks you're too quiet, same thing.

So it takes a kind of quiet courage.

Not a big loud “I don’t care what anyone thinks” vibe.

More like this:

“I’m okay if some people don’t get me. As long as I stay true to what I’m trying to build.”

🖼 [Insert image idea]

Caption: “Freedom isn’t everyone clapping. It’s you not needing them to.”

🖼 [Insert image idea]

Caption: “Pixel Parlour wasn’t built to be popular. It was built to be honest.”

🖼 [Insert image idea]

Caption: “Discomfort is the receipt for choosing your own path.”

/

Not sure if I’ll ever fully be okay with being disliked.

But I’m getting better at not needing approval to move forward.

Maybe start small.

Say the thing you believe. Even if it feels awkward.

Build the thing you wish existed. Even if no one claps at first.

What’s the worst that could happen?

Or actually…

what’s the best?